Wealth Bondage

In My Own Defense

Posted by The Deputy Editor , The Law in Wealth Bondage

Look, don't get me wrong, I would like to see every person get an even chance. You think Deputy Editor is a high paying job? But let's be realistic. The rich are getting richer and we are getting nowhere. We can sit around and complain or we can provide services the rich want for whatever they are wiling to pay. I would like to think that by promoting philanthropy in Wealth Bondge we have the best of both worlds. We are doing well by doing good. When you get a bunch of riffraff, living in Dumpsters, hassling the clientele, acting like they are Lords and Ladies themselves, presuming to tell the rich what to do with their money, it just screws up the whole show. I don't like rousting you losers down in the comments section and shuffling you off to jail or the Freedom Corral, but business is business. The rich deserve a little more courtesy. If we don't treat them right, they will go to some other Bordello. Excuse me, here comes Bill Gates now. Make way! Make way! Mr. Gates, may I have a moment Sir? Mr. Gates, What is the world we want? (Shut up you lot! He's talking to me.) You were saying, Mr. Gates?

Giving Well is the Best Revenge

Posted by The Deputy Editor, The Law in Wealth Bondage

Can't have an ownership society without ironclad property rights. I protect the bullion from the mines in which the Wealth Bondage Wage-Slaves mine it to the counting houses where Candidia cuts herself a bonus off the top before distributing wages, rents, bribes, and gifts. The stage coach must get through! When the owners put up the barbed wire and fence the prairie, I police the range. When the former owners are pushed back to their reservations, I make sure they get the casinos they need to prosper. "One good turn deserves another," as Jack Abramoff used to say. Whenever the stage coach is attacked by bad guys, I have a bag of pennies that I am authorized to strew on the road. The poor grab for them, and off we go. Hyaahh!

On Finding Your Own Voice

Posted by The Happy Tutor

I have friends like H. Peter Karoff, Phil Cubeta, and Tracy Gary who have found their own voice and always, no matter what they write, sound like themelves. I must say, though, it seems a little parochial. Why find your own voice when with a little extra effort you can find so many more?

Public Servants at Work

Smoky Joe, JD, in Defense of Freedom

I feel sorry for working families. I really do. Too bad the Democrats in the Senate are going to vote against raising the minium wage.

Wealth Bondage Philanthropy: Fighting to Preserve our Way of Life

Posted by Deputy Editor, The Law in Wealth Bondage

In a Free Society, like Wealth Bondage, some rise and some sink on their own merits. It is the law of the Wild West; the only law we recognize here in Wealth Bondage. Yet, Wealth Bondage need not be cruel. The winners are rewarded, as they well deserve, and the losers are provided for by Candidia Cruikshanks and other Compassionate Wealth Bondage Philanthropists. My hope as Sheriff, maintaining law and order, here in Wealth Bondage is twofold:

1. To protect and preserve personal property and the framework of rights, rules, laws, manners and mores that make it possible for the few to succeed while the many fail.  Basically, this comes down to Freedom and property laws.
2. To see to it that the least among us, like those huddled in the Dumpster here in Wealth Bondage, have what they need to retain their human dignity and a positive mental attitude even while eating garbarge and sleeping in it. Basically, this comes down to Freedom too. They too have their Freedom. And property laws apply to them too.

While these two goals may sometimes be in apparent conflict, since in the name of protecting personal property it is often necessary to drive the Dumpster Dwellers into the Freedom Pens, or beat them into submission, or hang one from the nearest tree as an example to the others, I try to be fair and to use only the degree of force necessary to maintain ordered liberty for all. Wherever possible, Candidia's funds permitting, I recommend philanthropy rather than brute force. Better that we win the hearts and minds of the losers with a few nickels and dimes than fight an ongoing gun battle from Dumpster to Dumpster in the streets of Wealth Bondage. They, the potential trouble-making Dumpster types are many; we, the good and the just are few. Let us use our heads. Give even 1% and all will be well in The World We Want here in Wealth Bondage. They don't expect much, the Dumpster Dwellers. A few dollars for a bottle of Thunderbird is about it. Stupified is exactly where we want them. Thunderbird, philanthropy, television, Holywood - it is all good. I am glad to report that, at least for tonight, everything is under control.

Speaking for Myself

After the original author function died, back in October of 2002, hacked to death, an apparent suicide in his cell, while under the protection of the Wealth Bondage Security Administration, the characters here took on lives of their own. In response to the growing unrest, I was recently appointed Deputy Editor by Candidia Cruikshanks to police the comment section, and to keep the Dumpster Dwellers in line.  It has not been easy. And, on a day to day basis The Happy Tutor has been more a hindrance than a help since he tends to side with the Dumpster Dwellers against the duly constituted authorities. So, I am here, six guns loaded, to keep Wealth Bondage safe, protect the personal property of those who have it, and to encourage grassroots giving among the Dumpster Dwellers to free up Candidia's philanthropic capital for more important social ventures like building out the Town Jail to accomodate prisoners of conscience, and promoting Freedom Worldwide. So, no back talk. Let's keep it positive. Philanthropy is the name of my game.  A little satire goes a long way when you are trying to cultivate wealthy people for The World We Want. Getting money out of these selfish bastards is hard enough without my having to listen to your snickering comments. So if you Dumpster Trash can't keep your damn mouths shut, I am taking you in, dead or alive.

Chinese Activist Beats Himself Up

Smoky Joe, JD, in Defense of Freedom

Nice one. He beat himself up. Well, China is a free country. He can beat himself up if he wants to, I guess.

Released For Time Served

Posted by The Happy Tutor

Matrullo:

Television and news organs made themselves into Pee-Wee's Playhouse to abort any friction with the poetics of advertising. Blogs expend a great deal of wit, intelligence, style. And, despite technological and otherconjiggerations, live or die thereby. So far.

Yes, poetics of advertising. Poetry, in the old Horation, formula is rhetoric; it delights and instructs. By holding the mirror up to nature, as to a woman's greying hair, it incites to action, as in buying stuff. To the business model of television or newspapers, "content" is a necessary evil, a cost item. Ads cost nothing, and create revenue. News and shows are the honey, or the candy coating, but the medicine inside is the ad. For the media, the deformation of the human soul is an externality. Whatever the cost, it is born by others. Tom Matrullo used to work for the The NY Times. He is now out on bail.

Abuse in Iraq was Routine

Smoky Joe, JD, in Defense of Freedom

Human Rights Watch:

"It is now clear that leaders were responsible for abuses in Iraq," Mr Sifton said. "It's time for them to be held accountable".

So, be realistic, why would the President appoint an independent prosecutor? The world is not warmer; Saddam had weapons of mass destruction; the jury is out on Darwin; pollution contains vitamins;  torture was not authorized; prisoners at Guantanamo get 4 course meals prepared by a French chef. In times of war, citizens must rally to the powers that be. We Patriots don't take kindly to traitors who question authority. Gonzalez will handle it with or without a warrant. What our internal security forces do is Top Secret so we can get the Terrorists. You get the picture. Now, what part of "shut up" do you not understand?

Free Suzane von Richthofen

Posted by Missy Proctor, WB '03

39 years for killing her stupid parents is totally insane when you think how rich they were. I mean why shouldn't heirs get the money at age 16, even if the parents are alive? Why should Daddy and Mommy decide? Heirs are the hope of the future. We shouldn't have to kill our own parents to get our money. They ought to change the law. When I get Daddy's money I am going to buy a think tank and some politicians and make sure heirs get their money when they need it most, at age 16 or earlier. I am tired of people blaming the victim. Free Suzane von Richthofen! Daddy is pretty healthy, but at least he is fat.